Whats with this G.Q!!!

What the f!@# is this G.Q .... i have heard of I.Q, E.Q and even G.K (dare u guys question my profeciency in these three areas!!...we will safely assume dat i cracked all this quotients with dream scores!....so humble of me!!...). I recently got to know what this stands for...Girl Quotient...gone are the days when a guy was considered a cool dude for his G.K , I.Q ..etc etc ..whatever..... believe me dudes....now ur dude meter is gauged by ur Girl quotient...

please read the following definition..which will soon be added in wikipedia...courtesy yours truly




A Girl Quotient or G.Q is a score derived from one of several different standardized tests attempting to measure intelligence about women. G.Q tests are used as predictors of flirting achievements. People with low G.Q scores are sometimes placed in special-needs education(what the f!@#.... please don ask me what education), and people with high G.Q scores are placed in gifted programs or enrichment programs(yeah these bas!@#s take away the girls).

Hmmmm..nobody can deny the fact dat almost all guys fall for girls... and are apparently suckered into voluntary suicide.....(i swear....i can already hear some women screaming at the top of their voice...and hell yeah!!! ...i am dead meat!!...am i losing my G.Q???)
Even Adam who was happy roaming freely with his dangling organs (keeeeen!!!keeeeen!!) was eventually doomed for life by the ever so intelligent Eve... yeah dudes..start believing...we are the losers... and still love losing.... (all smiles!!!....roomies start giving a looooooong speech about how they fell for woman and had absolute bliss!! its all tears now and emotinal scenes...finally family sentiments portrayed in my blog...so u !@#$ moderators...please rate this as UNIVERSAL..certified blog)

Not to be left behind in this area of intelligence...our dudes of hemu villa also have a daily conclave....read as Secret Conclave...(yeah!!! yeah!!! only the cats in the compound don't know about the discussion...coz its busy developing it G.Q to become the cool dude with other kitties)..and the topic of discussion...err..what else u morons...G.I.R.L.S.... we have the in-house statistician....one who knows how many girls in each section and their C.V....the guys with decent G.Q sharing their experiences and resource management techniques...and finally the guys with low G.Q receiving some gyan from the so called winners. and admist this yours truly taking the Minutes of the Meeting for the benifit of future reference...(Phew!!!finally i could manage to get a imaginative role.... and maintain my diplomatic stance!!!)...

Uhahahaha!!! now its time to put our plan to action....the evil laughter beckons....

scene 1:
time:8 30 am
location: Hemu Villa
Now that discussion is over and its time to sharpen our so called G.Q...... the dudes are dressing to look their best... the deo sprays are being used in high density.... pshhhhhhhh!!!! pshhhhhhh!!!
(ploop! there falls the lizard which was sticking to the wall...)....some hair styling and after scores of poses in front of the mirror...they wear their socks and shoes(ploop! there goes the other lizard falling from the wall....i swear some day this couple is gonna file P.I.L) and go to the college....with a mutual understanding....dat if anyone of us is sitting with a girl in the quadrangle...the other guys wil wave from a distance...and recognizing their wave..our hero wil call them near and introduce them to the girl...

Scene 2:
Time: 2:00 pm
Location: College quadrangle

After some gtalk, sleeping, day dreaming, listening???naa..,and some pysical presence in class lectures..it is time for a break!!!yipee... and our protagnist some how manages to have lunch with a girl... perfect...we spell it p.e.r.f.e.c.t s.c.e.n.e ...and its time for action... our hopefuls wave promptly at the lucky chap...and jus as u people guessed...the dude..errr....should i say...ditches??...yeah.. ditches the lot and looks the other way...as if the whole world is left sided...and there does not exist any other direction..
the girl thinks these are a set of wannabes jus waving at the helicopter flying-by...and there goes the chance for the lot to improve their G.Q...


the secret conclave ceases to exist and all the members become defunct by the single act of dishonesty of the league member..they swear on their life not to discuss this G.Q anymore in life....they feel dejected..(as if they din know that this was going to happen.... bull crap...their chances of getting an intro by a fellow member was as high as spotting mayawati in a pub!!! )

@$!@%%$#%^@$#.. swearing at the accused.. they decide to tear him apart when he gets back home.... all is ready for hell to break loose...and the traitor enters....everyone charges upon him... this defenceless chap bears the brunt...after 5 minutes of verbal barrage... things calm down.... they recognise the truimph of this lucky champ...praise his luck...and there you go...the secret conclave has started once again(what the f!@# happened to the oath and the promise u might ask....we guys will never stop this discussion till pamela anderson do us apart ) and once again i take down the minutes of the meeting wink!!wink!!


Disclaimer:

1.Please don mistake dat the characters in the story don do what they were supposed to do-study management education...
believe me...they are learning the new art of management...chick management...
2. this story is fictitious and resemblance to any real events is purely coincidental...(he he!! as if u guys are gonna believe this point)



"we tried our best and yet failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'..."-inspired quote for people who are as straight as jelabi...and who feel G.Q is not relevant for them.. he he he !!!

Update: Type girl quotient + srinath in google and u wil get my blog .... is google upto something??? hmmmm....

peace out

Sweet little violence on birthday!!!!!

FOREWORD: But-tock [P:buht-uhk]-either of the two fleshy protuberances forming the lower and back part of the trunk.



for the advantage of my family audience....please read the definition before proceeding for 2 reasons
1. Coz few guys lost the functionality of this organ...and are in search of a replacement surgery
2. this constitutes the central theme of this literature...(hmmm..eeps..literature!!!...did i say that...sorry guys this is not an erotic literature...so if anyone of u reading with that intentions..my humble apoligies...why the ff!@# am i apoligising for readers pervert intentions...i guess i have lost it somewhere...lol kidding...no harm intended)



Well...the most remembered day in a humans life is his birthday...yeah the unfortunate day that we all chose to increase the population of the world by one...(hmmm...not taking into account...future references and potential*wink!! wink!!*..i am pitching in with a conservative estimate!!)

and this is one day that special some guy or girl is treated as a special dunce.. and yeah is being raped monetarily(yeah!!yeah!! thats the reasons he gets special attention...we selfish nuts...wil never grow up)
But hemu villa studs choose the other way to celebrate this joyous occasion...with a cake and Much more importantly...BirthdayBums!!!
Just watch this video to understand the technical details of how to kick the Ass..not only proverbially but also realistically...
while watching the video...check out the following
1. one guy is wearing only one shoe..jus to increase the intensity of the reverberations with his blows
2. one other guy is exercising along with the mass just to take back his revenge
3. The central character or to be precise the protagnist of this show...losing every bit of the sensation left and losing the eligibility to sit comfortably on any plain surface... tchu!! tchu!! tchu!! deep regrets from my side...rest in peace!!








To maintain the hero and the stud image on this blog and for viewer discretion... my video has not been included in this post so that i maintain the hero image and attract the female audience...*or should i say everyone was so much invloved in kicking my
--- that they had no time to capture those gory violent footages which could cause heart attack to even hercules*

the aftermath of this nuclear explosion is pretty evident from the fact that the restricted and highly fibrous cushion pad of the victims has become a non entity... and the ability to s(h)it has also become as complex as sub atomic particle acceleration...well the point i wanted to convey was...err..what was i conveying.... sorry got confused with particle physics and biology..saary ..eee

taking into account the serious repurcurssions and the deadly intentions of my friends...

july 8th every year has been declared as dry day for bum kicking... this is a national emergency protocol.... well thats my b day if u guys din know...trying to spread around peace message atleast in my pretext... well done srinath..clap!!! clap!!!

another point...

the perpatrators of this crime.. please pour in with ur views in comments section..as to what pleasure u derived out of this....

and as victims of this crime...share ur after disaster management and recovery strategy to keep ur posterior functional

and normal viewers..ur feedback as to shld this noble token of love be propagated and made into an act for the future generations to understand its beauty...

harey rama!!!

P.S: this is the victim's reaction after the footbal session

Come on boys.. time for sports!!!

yeah guys .... now that the 11 was formed... its time to kick some err.... get into action... and play some sports... some one came up with the idea..lets play footbal in the beach *whoa!!! wow!!way to go!! we shal dig it!!* there was sparks flying high.. and every one instantly became beckam, zidane, and ...and..and hmmm yeah ganguly.....skreeeesh(*eeps..did i go over board by mentioning the latter....god bless me..slip of tongue..but does he not play footbal in the crease*) extreme high energy and every one was more than ready to get it started... finally some sporting action.... next day morning i get up with stary eyes jus thinkin that i wil get to move my lazy legs.... and what do i see!!! rains outside... goodness gracious!! and i hope i have dissapointed faces around me in the room... but alas...everyone is sleeping as if there is no tomo.... !@#$!@$@#!$ .. . what the f!@# ... i was the sucker who believed guys are very active and were gonna get up from their bed for some good neat play...
i become nostalgic....
hmmmm ......a small flashback about this sucker's sporting galore.....

its sunday morning... alarm rings at the right time....vision is clear... the focus is right...i have my milk.....some sun screen...sun glasses right up there in its position....shoes put on... there u have... a player.... now taking the bat, the professional cricketer is on his way to the lush green grounds to play the subtle game of ........hmmmm well..argh hmmm....street cricket....*!@#!@#!@ why the f!@# was that build up for?????? u might ask..... but then believe me i played that game as if we were playing in the lords... and apparently that ground was also lords of our area*

tennis ball cricket is amazing game... u got to play it to feel the thrill involved with that game..a group of around 15 people assemble for a light game of soft ball cricket *did i say light.. pardon me.... u must see it to beileve it.. bowlers abusing the batsman with the filthiest words...and fist fights happening for matters as small as....bowler was wearing yellow underwear while bowling... huh.. as if any other reason would bring about peace in the mass *
here is a group which flouts all the possible rules in the lawbooks of cricket...and players using sublime techniques of the game...whoosh check out this video of our ace batsman trying to hit the tennis ball... read the word trying... but the ball got the better of him












well if you think that was a sound technique shown by our batsmen .. then you are yet to see other set of players....we innovate new shots and play cricket as if it was tennis..he he he he....


check out the pavillion...





l to r: jacks guru..the dude with the sungls me..adi..santosh



and this is the trio:







again the banda...praveen..guru... bindaas players....

we break the glasses in the neighbourhood... i broke one with my fine leg glances and that is still a standing testimony....apparently.. that glass was not fixed and i also din pay for the same till the building was brought down.... amen...
imagine... all working guys coming on sundays in shorts... and we gang up to play like kids.... phew.. will never grow up...
long live street cricket.. long live smiling fox cricket club...

R.O.O.M.I.E.S

well.... now the banda has come to hemu villa for his maiden away from home innings... and to a place u all know.. hemu villa (*esooos me!!! please stop murdering the name hemu... its h.e.m.u not the other name u guys are obssessed with*). Hostels have a creepy reputation for ragging and other *wink wink* matters, but i was fairly at ease and comfortable given the fact that i will be living in a flats. that too a fully furnished flat (*for which we are being charged.. i mean attaaacked!!!! with a hefty rent which would give a complexion to 7 star hotels.... err not in facilities.. jus in money dude..... hmmmmm...would it not be nice if were also given nice services and a greeting from the beautiful receptionists like in a hotel*)

Well the first look at the flat was satisfactory .... roomy, with loads of space.. typical 3 bhk.. with a biiiig hall. and was wondering given the fact that only 2-3 people had turned up as my roomies. thought the whole hall was to myself... (*sheesh too much of imagination on my side... i guess i will beat J K rowling some day*) and finally my roomies .. all of them landed up... andthus finally the h.e.m.u villa 1st floor group was formed.

we have characters in our floor.. real characters....

AYE-J- hmmmm oldie goldie but name any girl and he knows her- courtesy orkut or college quadrangle

AYE-J 2- there are only 2 ways about a trivia.... either he knows it.. or the fact is wrong...

An Mole- sobre at all times but has his way around with people.. and is AYE J's partner in crime...

Ab-Shake- dude who decide things at the impulse of events..decisive.... oops that was pun unintended.. pardon... nice dude.. who gets up before me and goes to sleep after me... am i missing something here??

Door-Pin- Stud muffin.... abhishek style hair band... can be mistaken for a member of fairer sex from behind.. he he he.. after all we live in h.e.m.u villa..

Pressed- Oops does the name sound provocative???? well this stud is too waiting for something like that despera..errr no no jus like that ... he he he... his KREC experience speakin...

Gaurd off- well the other guys are gaurded off coz.. every day this guy is seen with a different girl .. makin things difficult for others..

Maddy- madly friends with our A-GAY.. sorry sorry AYE-J... naaa kiding....

a seriel petrol bunk... no limits to load... official guzzler...and as of now a finance certified stud too

RAG- OH- seemingly calm and unfazed by girls typo pretence.. but unofficially trying to steal the resources from AYE-J's friend list.. tough competiton... orkut is his adopted home.. even if he is lost in ptu-ku-fumlu islands in some part of the world.. u will touch base with him thru orkut... orkut servers having sleepless nights because of him

Subka-sarkar- well man of limited words... but he puts it in nicely at the right time that even sachin cant beat him in timing...

and finally urs truly.. for whom no introduction is needed.... (*well atleast thats my my safe assumption to save on few lines abt me and of self destructive drudgery*)

this is the official 11 .. a.k.a the team of h.e.m.u villa 1st floor... and when this group gets to open house discussion.. well the topic is .. err girls.....and when the groupie get tired of it... take a break and again talk about girls....this excludes the urs truly ..... (*hmmm again a face saving line*)

goodness gracious.. i thought we all aspiring managers were here to study management theory.

goodspeed

MUMBAI MATINEE-BHEJA FRY PART 2

Now that the dude has lost the IT professional tag and gained the b-school student tag(*as if i have been conferred with a post doctrate after being a grade 1 researcher..phew these days i indeed keep imagining things in extravagant ways*), its time to pack bags and leave chennai. Chennai has been my pally right from my childhood days and the strong idly sambhar flavour distintive of chennai is my basic mantra and cosmic energy for my bodily functions. Leaving chennai and friends for a good 2 years meant dramatic scenes at the airport and emotions running high like in the daily soap flicks. But alas that was not to happen; 2 groups landed up one after another for my farewell...err or rather should i say to check if this dude (*eeeps dude... i used this word for the betterment of my family audience..in reality they were much more provocative....na na much more decent*) It looked like a goat sacrifice procession and and my friends clicking my photos..hmmm may be for the RIP slab on my grave.. ha ha ha,, kidding... the scene was much akin to that...the people around me thought that i was going for some arctic expedition or something... that was the build up given by my compassionate friends (*!@@#$ used in lieu for lack of better words*). But thankfully the second group was much more decent and well behaved (*this is just a figurative speech.. though these three are also equally well known for their traditional leg pulling*)

left to right: Kulla vivek(*he is as tall as me when i was in fifth standard*) , me (*no comments*), vetti guru (*though professionally he is a TL in a bank BPO still considered the vetti for being the oldest one to hang around with young guys like us*) and Scene hari (*do i have to eloborate on this? in short fizzy*)

these 3 again part of my close network of dear pallies... and infact they cried their heart out when i left them to check-in(*sheesh am i going over board with fiction*)

Well after recieving the farewell and electric send off.. it was time to board the flight and say buy buy to chennai. Was feeling bad inside for having to leave chennai... but i needed a motivation to keep myself charged for rest of my journey to the MAXIMUM CITY. just then i checked my boarding pass and a flash bulb lit in the Hypothalamus portion of the brain(*jus a try to show off that i too studied biology once upon a time... pardon me :)*) well to put things in right perspective.. let me tell you that the thought of being served well by the air hostess was the motivation i was talkin about. With high hopes i boarded the flight just to find out a woman saying "Beta welcome aboard the flight to mumbai.. happy journey". there went the motivation out of the window -45 year old air hostess is heights of dissapointment.. and i slept tight for the next 1-45 min (*Indian .. best experience... this is what apparently the ticket brochure says.... damn.. mera IA mahaan..!@#!@ *)

After a eventful journey (*did i say eventful... heights of creativity!!!*) i reached the city of dashing bollywood. After taking my baggage i left for my apartment in vile parle juhu...

we live in a place called homo villa... oops sorry hemu villa (*in reality this villa has a high influx of guys... imagine 39 guys inclusive of all the floors and no sign of fairer sex population*)

finally i reached my apartment and this was the begining for my 2 years of hostel life as management student.

the transition is evident...............

slow aamchi mumbai flavour hitting my senses...........