Theory of bewada evolution!!!!!

PHEW!!!!!! its been quite some time since i wrote anything in my blog. let me see when was the last time i wrote anything in my blog. eeeps....!!!! that was before the first trim exams.... imagine it took me so much time to recover from the trauma that i am writing a blog after second trim exams!!!! 3 months coma in fact.... but to add flavor to my break, i would say that i devoted this time researching..or wait...... yeah....evolving is the right word. I was evolving a new theory.
AND here u have the theory of bewada evolution!!!!

in the span of 9 months in bombay i have noticed too many wild wild people trying to pay ode to the spirit of spirits (was that sounding idiotic?). Err....actually to be very accurate i have noticed a pattern of behavior exhibited by the glorious drunk and merry junta.
So lets get to business and analyse these kinds......


1. Two pitchers of KF and and one shot of hard liquor....HICK!!!! HICK!!! burp!!!
Now that can qualify as drunk by the standards of even a guy with KEG capacity....
Symptoms:
Broad smile on face. "Buddy" this word is used more than 10 times in a conversation spanning 2 minutes. Oh!!! what a flourishing friendly love!..u might think. But the next 5 minutes will have conversations like this...." Buddy you are a Bas****!!", "Buddy what the F*** !! are u trying to make fun of me?" , "Buddy, get ur A** moving"
these people start Swearing at will as if these words are going to be banned from tomo.....

2. Haywards 5000 and 10000......emptied and arranged on the table like the nine pins....
DRUNK? U bet... hell ya!!!!!

Symptoms:
They are highly immobile people.... they come home in the oblivion and the most important activity for them the next 2-3 hours is going to be ..UUUUUUWWWWWAAAccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!! the jus download in broadband mode.....imagine this.... they even puke the paper chits they had swallowed in 6th std exams before being caught. The restroom is their den for teh whole night and even if u want to take a leak..u might want to think twice before asking them... or else u might have a pukey experience.

3. They analyse the balancesheets of the companies and decide which liquor to drink and get smashed...this is basically to increase the patronage for the sick beer companies...... considerate people in the making!!!!

Symptoms:
Draw a straight line and ask them to walk along this straight line. If they end up drawing the LOCUS of lines or hyperbolas or parabolas. Then u can confirm that they are in different world altogether. Minimum 2 rambos required to transport these people back home. They have lost the art of walkin tall... or shld i say ..they have learnt the art of flying high..HICK!!!!!!

4. These people just feel euphoric to say cheers. CHEERS!! gulp!!!! oops forgot to say cheers to shublet..... here u go CHEERS!!! ! gulp!!!second down......all of a sudden, he hears a CHEERS!!!! from the back.... gets outrageously angry..orders a third one....and raises a individual cheers in anger of being left out...... GULP....now all he can hear is cheers.....state of nirvana reached....

SYMPTOMS:

basically you will notice the symptoms the next day..... this guy will be emerging out of bed the next day with his TIE, BLAZERS, SHOES, SOCKS in tact. And he will unassumingly ask did i come late from the office yesterday. U will feel like swearing at him heavily for the CHEERS marathon he involved u in yesterday. Buy nonetheless bewadas never get the IRE of the public. its only the laughter...he he he he!!!!


5. These people are the most special...they can audition for broadway theatre and get the protagnist role coz their mood swings are world renown. All they need is some budweiser and fosters in their elite company.

SYMPTOMS: its all well and good till the last gulp of the 4th bottle goes in. Then they are one of the most happy people in life.... here is a testimony.... one of my roomies(for the record...most paranoid when it comes to studies).. jus mention trimester 3, education, Finance paper, placements etc etc in front of him. If you don't hear any of the following reactions,
1. OH!!!! S*** yaar, i have study....
2. What the F***, there is so much to study
3. Oh my god i am already mind f***ed
4. i will go to the college for night studies from tomo...
then u can safely assume he is drunk and merry. Infact most happy in his life. infact no one can get happier than this, if my roomie forgets abt studies even for a hour.


this evolution theory holds good in quite many circle i guess. and if u are able to find ur friend suiting one of these above mentioned profiles, then yeah have proof for consistent mass behaviour.

After all this research i have started wondering....will i ever get high on more than 3 rounds of pineapple juice so as to fall in one of these categories....tat was the most indirect way of saying i don drink..he he he he....!!!!

N.B:I jus came from TOTO's before writing this blog.....and i swear i had only LASSI over there!!!